DianaCuddle Clubs the new Sex Clubs
May 19th 2008 01:27
The 'no sex for twelve years' thingo has prompted quite a debate which is interesting and exciting, don't ya reckon?
Debate has been quite strong at my place of work this morning too, where I showed some of my more broad-minded colleagues what I had been up to over the weekend.
One younger male teacher said that since the birth of their child two years ago he could count on one hand the amount of times he and his wife had made love.
Another told me that, immediately she fell pregnant his wife made him move out of their bedroom and locked the door each night! He said he accepted this cos she had said all along that she only wanted to sleep with him to have kids!
None of us knew what to say to that. Then he went off to teach his drums lesson.
It reminds me of that old joke where a couple are at the marriage counselors the question is asked:
"What about your sex life? How often um..."
"Oh, all the time," responds the wife. "Three times a week at least.."
"Hardly ever," says the husband. "only about three times a week."
It's true, marriage is not all about sex. Relationships are not all about sex. In fact where did I read where it said that sex is now out in many marriages, people are just not getting it together any more?
And also did anyone see that bit in the paper about 'Cuddle Clubs' starting up in the States and now becoming popular in Australia cos people are living increasingly isolated lives and crave physical contact?
Cuddle Clubs are where they can get together with other similary-deprived individuals and enjoy physical contact with fellow humans.
When my hubby was away in Sydney for three months a few years ago leaving me with three small children, I was fine for about 2 of those months. I mean, I had the kids to cuddle n stuff. But one night I was at rehearsal and my fellow-musician for some reason rubbed my back and boy, did I get a jolt and yearn for more! I then found myself yearning for pysical contact with others, would throw myself at people, men or women, for a cuddle and was desperate.
Then here is the lamb, Rose. She can't survive without one long cuddle in my arms per day. It must be in-built in humans and animals for survival to have warm contact with another mammal.
Of course, I am prattling on about cuddles here, not sex, but still one thing leads to another and you probably get what I am saying.
And don't think the with-holding of contact is just woman to man. One of my friends is totally happy in her marriage except she says her husband does not openly show any affection to her. He will never say "I love you", unless in the throes of intimacy. He does not kiss and cuddle her in front of the kids and will only show affection in the bedroom, between the sheets. Every know and then she wails about this, then just gets on with life.
More later.
Have just spied a lovely husky blokey male prowling around the staffroom and I'm gonna worm my way over for a nice cuddle....
Debate has been quite strong at my place of work this morning too, where I showed some of my more broad-minded colleagues what I had been up to over the weekend.
One younger male teacher said that since the birth of their child two years ago he could count on one hand the amount of times he and his wife had made love.
Another told me that, immediately she fell pregnant his wife made him move out of their bedroom and locked the door each night! He said he accepted this cos she had said all along that she only wanted to sleep with him to have kids!
None of us knew what to say to that. Then he went off to teach his drums lesson.
It reminds me of that old joke where a couple are at the marriage counselors the question is asked:
"What about your sex life? How often um..."
"Oh, all the time," responds the wife. "Three times a week at least.."
"Hardly ever," says the husband. "only about three times a week."
It's true, marriage is not all about sex. Relationships are not all about sex. In fact where did I read where it said that sex is now out in many marriages, people are just not getting it together any more?
And also did anyone see that bit in the paper about 'Cuddle Clubs' starting up in the States and now becoming popular in Australia cos people are living increasingly isolated lives and crave physical contact?
Cuddle Clubs are where they can get together with other similary-deprived individuals and enjoy physical contact with fellow humans.
When my hubby was away in Sydney for three months a few years ago leaving me with three small children, I was fine for about 2 of those months. I mean, I had the kids to cuddle n stuff. But one night I was at rehearsal and my fellow-musician for some reason rubbed my back and boy, did I get a jolt and yearn for more! I then found myself yearning for pysical contact with others, would throw myself at people, men or women, for a cuddle and was desperate.
Then here is the lamb, Rose. She can't survive without one long cuddle in my arms per day. It must be in-built in humans and animals for survival to have warm contact with another mammal.
Of course, I am prattling on about cuddles here, not sex, but still one thing leads to another and you probably get what I am saying.
And don't think the with-holding of contact is just woman to man. One of my friends is totally happy in her marriage except she says her husband does not openly show any affection to her. He will never say "I love you", unless in the throes of intimacy. He does not kiss and cuddle her in front of the kids and will only show affection in the bedroom, between the sheets. Every know and then she wails about this, then just gets on with life.
More later.
Have just spied a lovely husky blokey male prowling around the staffroom and I'm gonna worm my way over for a nice cuddle....
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Comment by Cibbuano
Hunt Famous
Orble Post of the Day
Fat Cult
Techbreak
It's tragic to hear about sexless marriages - but I suppose it's equally tragic to hear your friend complain that there's not enough affection, too.
Comment by Demeter
She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of un-met needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.
Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and, after asking the wife to stand, embraced and kissed her passionately.
The woman shut up and quietly sat down as though in a daze.
The therapist turned to the husband and said, "This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?" The husband thought for a moment and replied,..
"Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I fish."
Comment by Tyronne
Sydney Fun
Melbourne DiaryStar
Comment by Ahmed
Video Gamer Kids
Little Green Foosballs
PolyKicks
That is so bad ass but also so wrong.
Comment by Diana
Eyes On Oz
Thanks for all the fabulous comments and all your insights. It is food for thought as we try to make sense of our lives.
Comment by InaneRoarAdd
Thought so.